Every Woman Real. Every Woman Whole.

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EVERY WOMAN REAl. EVERY WOMAN WHOLE.

 

If becoming a mom has meant some surprising things for you as a woman and you'd like a little more support, we've got a place for you.

Totum, which means "whole" in Latin, is devoted to acknowledging the woman as she enters motherhood.

 
 
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You’ve Got This, Mama.

Our cookies are nutritious and tasty, helping mothers increase their milk supply, energy and sense of satisfaction, and providing the nutrients and support a mother needs during a magical but trying time.

 
 

Motherhood Inspiration + Advice

 
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“We Belong Together” Tees

A tee shirt perfect for nursing moms and anyone who wants to combine style and message. 30% of proceeds are dedicated to supporting the rights of immigrants and people of color.

 
 

We Want to Hear From You!

Totum was founded as a platform for your voice. We share real stories in hopes that they bring comfort and empowerment to other women. Read about our Story Submission Process here.

 
 

Female Founder Collective

Totum Women is a proud member of Female Founder Collective, a network of businesses led by women, supporting women. By purchasing from Totum, you are empowering female-run business and creating a solid foundation for our girls to keep leading.

 

@totumwomen

Toddlers: when they go low, you go high. ✨ Pretty sure that’s not who @michelleobama was referencing, but I say it to myself on loop when our little ones get fired up. ✨ Happy Monday, mamas. Thanks for all the ways you choose to “go high” that seem to go unnoticed. ✨ Gorgeous image @bennierose
Was your paid maternity leave long enough? Did you even have paid maternity leave? How long was it? • The topic of maternity leave comes up so much in conversation among our friends, who come from different frames of references and even different countries. My Canadian friends have come to expect around a year paid leave. Some European friends have at least 6 months, and I’ve heard of 18 months from Scandinavian friends. • With our first baby, I had no paid leave because was working for a startup with just under 50 employees, but I chose to file for disability to cover 3 months. During that time, I was still part of all major leadership team decisions. I never felt truly unavailable. And I was scared to death to head back fully. When I went back, I was miserable. And though I loved the job and had helped build the company, I chose to leave. • Second time around, I was in a similar boat at a different company and was told to stay on top of emails the whole time. Similar result re: eventually leaving for more time with our children. • Third time around, I worked for myself so gave myself some grace but truthfully never fully stopped, having just soft-launched Totum a month before birth. • Going back to work while still sleep deprived and nursing is gutting on many levels. I remember feeling like I couldn’t think of simple words at big meetings. I felt like I’d left the most vulnerable part of me at home in the care of someone I’d just recently met. (Thankfully she turned out to be our family’s angel). • I often wonder how my decisions regarding work might have been different had I had a year off to fully bond with our babies, assist them with sleeping through the night, and wean them. I think women would gain so very much from more supportive and predictable structure around maternity leave. • Did your leave serve you? What might have made it better? Really want to know.
Even when it feels like everything is running off the rails. Like today, when I’m sidelined with the stomach flu, reliant on help from family, missing out on the day I’d planned with our baby, and too nauseous to get to the pile of to-dos. We are all more than #enough. • I’m thinking about all the single moms who do this on your own. You amaze me. • Love you, ladies! 💕 Amazing image and sentiment @enlightenedcam
Touched down late last night after a wonderful, restful weekend with only our oldest child, and bang 💥 as soon as we turned our phones on we got word that our 4 year old and 15 month old were vomiting at home. You feelin’ me, mamas? • Our poor babies. And for me, while away I’d read two incredibly inspiring books and was so excited to attack the week. • Yeah, not so much with two kids sick and desperate for their mama who’d been gone a few days. • A dear friend always says that “ceaseless effort” is one of the only certainties we have in our existence. Sometimes the effort plus the emotions of motherhood (crammed into an hour I feel gratitude and joy, compassion anxiety and empathy, overwhelm and impatience) are just exhausting! And keeping the hustle and drive is tough. Today is one of those days. • To any of you feeling this way today, you’re doing great, and you’re absolutely not alone! Let’s keep going. Image @tayneetinsley
Touched down late last night after a wonderful, restful weekend with only our oldest child, and bang 💥 as soon as we turned our phones on we got word that our 4 year old and 15 month old were vomiting at home. 😔 • image @tayneetinsley Our poor babies. And for me, while away I’d read two incredibly inspiring books and was so excited to attack the week with energy and positivity. • Not so much with two kids sick desperate for their mama who’d been gone a few days. • A dear friend always says that “ceaseless effort” is one of the only certainties we have in our existence. Sometimes the effort plus the emotions of motherhood (crammed into an hour I feel gratitude and joy, compassion anxiety and empathy, overwhelm and impatience) are just exhausting! And keeping the hustle and drive is tough. Today is one of those days. • To any of you feeling this way today, you’re doing great, and you’re absolutely not alone! Let’s keep going.
It was a traumatic birth. They used forceps, and they tore me. I hemorrhaged a lot. I was suffering from postpartum depression. My milk didn’t come. That bond that was supposed to happen, it just didn’t. • I felt like I was a bad mother and I was terrified. It surprised me, this feeling of fear, and later on as I looked back at it, I knew why ... I always saw my mother as a victim. Woman equals victim. I am a woman. I am going to be damaged. I am going to be crushed. - Jane Fonda on her first birth • Watched “Jane Fonda in Five Acts” yesterday and was so moved by her honesty about motherhood. She opened up about her distant relationship with her own mother and how she only learned after her mother’s suicide that her mother was someone who both savored life and suffered deeply. In Jane’s view, her broken relationship with her mother complicated her relationship with her daughter. • There’s always more going on than meets the eye, with every mom, with everyone! You’re doing a great job dealing with a lot. Chin up, lady loves. 💕
Do you feel the strain of carrying the family mental and emotional load? This gender dynamic didn’t bug me until becoming a mom. Now, the mental load is real. Found myself in this conversation yesterday while cleaning up toys and making dinner for two of the three kids. • H: Can you just text me the directions to where I pick him up from golf? Me: I can, but no, I’m gonna have you do that yourself. • Of course I then felt rude/bitchy (more emotional labor?) but felt an even stronger sense that if I keep doing the physical and the mental by myself, I’m not helping anyone. • Here’s to finding ways to shed your mental load today, moms. I dare you! • Image @freeform with thanks to @sarahsophief for finding
Happy International Women’s Day! What is the best advice you got from your mom?