Totum Story Submissions
Thank you for sharing your motherhood story with us.
Totum means "whole" in Latin. We love the word because our mission is to serve real women and help them stand in the fullness of their powerful identities. A big part of that is welcoming and hearing from a wide range of women in order to best serve them.
This all started because I noticed that there were precious few resources for the woman after she gave birth, and I believe she deserves much more. We’re here to shake up the status quo and bolster women in their identities as they pass into motherhood. We love being mothers, but we’re much more than “mommy.”
We know that no two women have an identical experience, but it’s by sharing honestly that we come to understand each other and our own experiences more deeply. Here we share without secrets -- no shame, no judgment, no fear of being polite, no right or wrong answers. We want you in all your authentic wonder!
Your voice is critical to our mission. The “stories” section of our site is dedicated to maintaining a platform for women to share their motherhood experiences, spanning the topics of pregnancy, labor, breastfeeding, return to work, finding balance and beyond. Your story truly has the potential to change another life. We’re so grateful that you’re here to share it with us.
Tone: Be honest. Be kind. Be inclusive. Don’t be afraid to challenge the status quo. Celebrate yourself and other women as strong and powerful.
Voice: Don’t be afraid to be you -- whether that means funny and crass or soft and soulful. We challenge ourselves to avoid defaulting to industry “mommy” speak wherever possible. We aim to see our experiences through a lens of compassion and strength, without judgment or shame.
Imagery: Please share any photos that are relevant to and help tell your story. Professional shots -- 900px or larger on all sides -- are preferred, wherever possible, but we welcome all images that speak to the real you. Our style is documentary, behind the scenes, raw and honest. We are not trying to be too “pretty” or made up. Just us, as we are (which is to say, gorgeous).
Please try to keep the word count under 1,000. We will read your story for spelling, grammar and sense check, but we will not alter it substantially. If we have any significant changes, we will follow up with you over email to discuss the issue. We cannot wait to share your story!
What was the biggest surprise to you when you became a mom for the first time?
How did you feel about returning to work?
Did you plan to breastfeed your baby? How did it go? Better or worse than expected?
What were your expectations going into nursing your baby, if you had any?
Please share your labor and delivery story.
How was your recovery from labor?
How has entering motherhood changed with successive births?
If you lost a pregnancy and want to share your story, we would be grateful to hear from you in order to support other women going through the same thing.
Do you want to share a fertility journey with us?
Was your partner supportive of your decision to go back to work or stay home with baby? What did that decision look like for you?
Did you decide to hire support after giving birth, e.g. baby nurse, nanny, housekeeper?
If so, what has that relationship meant for you and for your family? How has your relationship with your partner evolved since becoming a mother?
Can you share your values before entering motherhood as compared with your values now (may be helpful to think of your top 3-6 values before/after)?
What do you miss most about your life before becoming a mother?
What has been the best thing you've given up since becoming a mother?
Has your journey into motherhood been marked mostly by physical, emotional, relational or psychological change? How have these dynamics affected your identity as a woman now that you're a mother?